He is gone.

I just ordered a quarter pounder w/ cheese from Micky D’s and accidentally went with “no pickles” instead of “no onions” and I legit want to cry at my own failure as a human being.

pidgerinbalt:

Ykw fuck everything I’m making some goddamn frozen sausage rolls and honey mustard and I’m gonna live the damn good life while wearing a pink dragon onesie and a galaxy patterned daddy hat.

This is adulthood in a nutshell.

They were delicious.

Follow-up post, sometimes I forget Xedramon follows me on here and seeing her like my stuff makes me freak out a tad.

I love it. May I never stop forgetting you.

Ykw fuck everything I’m making some goddamn frozen sausage rolls and honey mustard and I’m gonna live the damn good life while wearing a pink dragon onesie and a galaxy patterned daddy hat.

This is adulthood in a nutshell.

So like

There was a Duracell commercial on TV and all it fucking was? Santa was holding up a C-size Duracell battery w/ a shelf full behind him, and the batteries disappeared in puffs of smoke. Santa looks confusedly at the camera. Random people start screaming at the camera. A woman was trying to stuff a wholr chicken while screaming. Kids were running around screaming. Elves started screaming.

Santa still looked confused.

What the fuck did I just watch.

A fruit fly landed in my fresh cup of coffee and let me tell you about the wail of absolute despair that slipped through my lips.

Even my dog felt bad for me and came to snuggle with me.

Hi @schwilliamp what’s good dude.

Yeah… I’m starting to think those expressions are gonna have to wait ‘till tomorrow, ‘cause this system scan is taking 500 fucking years to actually finish 😦

My inbox is full of Harold and it makes me so fucking happy you have no idea.